Ask for Exactly What I Want

Win-Win What Does That Really Mean?
February 7, 2014
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February 15, 2014

One of my mentors Clinton Swaine of Frontier Trainings takes that one step further which is “Ask 6 Times For Exactly What I Want.” It doesn’t necessarily have to be 6 times, it’s more about the ask and being persistent to get to yes.  Often times we just don’t ask.  Our culture in the U.S. is one where we have been taught not to push the envelope in many situations, just accept things as they are.  That doesn’t work when you want to accomplish something, get something changed or not be taken advantage of.  Asking, speaking up is necessary to make things happen.

One month I was out of town and forgot to make a payment on an account.  I had never been late before so had a good track record.  The bank has an automatic program that charges a late fee when you are late with a payment.  It’s a $30 late fee.  I wasn’t willing to accept that so thought I would ask if they would give me a courtesy consideration and remove the charge because I had never been late before and this was a one-time mistake.  Guess what?  They removed the charge. It would not have had the possibility of being removed had I not asked.

Bottom line, be willing to ask for what you want no matter what the circumstances.  You might be told no, but you won’t be told yes to anything you don’t ask for.

Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Veteran negotiation and contracts expert Eldonna Lewis-Fernandez, author of “Think Like a Negotiator,” has over 30 years of experience crafting killer deals both stateside and internationally, many in excess of $100 million. She’s currently the CEO of Dynamic Vision International — a specialized consulting and training firm that helps individuals hone negotiation skills — as well as a nationally regarded keynote speaker, session leader and panelist on the Art of Negotiation. Eldonna may be reached online at

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