Be the Master of Your Own Game

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Be the master of your own game. What does it mean to be the master of your own game?  The game I’m referring to is the inner game, that self-talk that either propels us forward or sets us back. How do you play that game to win?  You have to use the right tools.  For self talk there are tools you must use to combat the negativity that would cause your inner game to lose vs win.

Self-Talk – we all have it.  It’s that voice in our head that either says go for it you can do it or who do you think you are trying to do that?  It maybe someone else’s voice that told you things as a kid that you have carried with you throughout your life.

I saw a post on Facebook recently that said something like post the thing you remember your mother saying.  It was meant to be lighthearted and positive.  However, my mother was an alcoholic and all I remember her saying was “you are not good, you’re a hellion, a spoiled brat and to get out of her sight.”

That and many other horrible things she said and did stuck with me for many years until I did the work to turn it around.  Do I still have my days?  Yes of course.  We live in a negative world and you have to fight to stay positive.

Here are a few things to do to start your day on an upbeat note.

  1. As soon as you get up, even before you get out of bed, think of something you are grateful for. Here are a few of my examples:  being able to sit up, stand up and walk.  Having clean water, a home, food and clothing.  My sanity and serenity.  These are only a few and they may seem mundane, but I know someone who is paralyzed from the chest down from a car accident, hundreds of families that lost everything in fires, hurricanes or earthquakes this year and countries where there is no clean drinking water.  Be thankful for everything. You can even make a list.  When you really think about and are thankful for the things you take for granted, you get a different perspective and see how many good things you have in your life that many don’t have.
  2. Put on some upbeat, positive or powerful music to start your day.  It’s hard to be negative when you listen to something that is upbeat.  I’m listening to this as I write this post:

This video is great too but the music empowers me to take charge of my day.  Find something that resonates with you.

  1. Ask yourself these questions:
    • What do I absolutely LOVE about myself today?
    • What have I done today to be of service?
    • What do I love about (someone you know)?

If the first question is hard to ask you need to work hard on that.  You can’t give something you don’t have.  If you don’t love who you are or something about you, how do you expect to be loving toward anyone in your life?  I didn’t say like here, this is true love, the person we need to love the most.  Also, being of service in some small way is a great strategy to get out of your own way.  There’s a saying that goes “when I got busy I got better.”  What that means is you can’t be down on yourself when you are serving others then this would provide an answer to the first question.  What do I absolutely love about myself?  I am being of service today by doing X.  Finally loving something about a family member or friend is a way to give love in your thoughts.

Doing these 3 things will help you combat the negativity in your life.  I have my clients do these on a regular basis.  There are some other things that I have them do as well.  I find the ones that do them consistently have better results.  The key word is consistently.  You have to do things on a consistent basis in order to have success.  You cannot flip a light switch to be an expert or successful at anything.

The Power is in The Work!

To Your Success





P.S.  Want to get help on how you can master your inner game?  Sign up for a FREE confidence booster call and let me help you figure that out.  Get on my schedule here:

Schedule a Strategy Call with Eldonna


Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Veteran negotiation and contracts expert Eldonna Lewis-Fernandez, author of “Think Like a Negotiator,” has over 30 years of experience crafting killer deals both stateside and internationally, many in excess of $100 million. She’s currently the CEO of Dynamic Vision International — a specialized consulting and training firm that helps individuals hone negotiation skills — as well as a nationally regarded keynote speaker, session leader and panelist on the Art of Negotiation. Eldonna may be reached online at

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