Use Your Leverage to Get to the Know, Like and Trust Factor

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When Thinking Like A Negotiator, there are 3 types of leverage, Personal, Positional and Relational. In this blog post, you will learn about relational leverage and some examples both in business and personal situations.

Relational leverage is that leverage you have from a relationship that you can leverage in your negotiation situation. It could be in business or personal life. You would use this type of leverage when you need some outside help with a situation and you have a relationship with someone who can bridge the gap and help you with what you need.

Here are some personal examples of how to use relational leverage when you don’t have a know, like and trust factor for your situation.

1. Recently a friend asked me if I knew a trademark attorney that I would recommend. I have had the same attorney for trademarks for many years and I gave her the referral. She set up a call and hired her. She didn’t have anyone she knew and sought out a referral from someone she trusted would give her a good reference.

2. My car started having issues with the catalytic converter, then it overheated and needed brakes. My car has not 1 but 2 catalytic converters and pricing the parts and labor I knew it was going to be expensive. I had a previous problem with a place that I thought was trustworthy attempt to overcharge me by 5 times the amount I found doing my own research. I used Facebook to get referrals from my friends. They all provided different suggestions and I chose one based on the recommendation. I found out my water pump was also bad (I had run out of fluid and the car had overheated once and I knew something was wrong) and of course the brakes and then a couple other sensors. The job was $5,000! UGH! But this company gave me a rental car at no cost for 5 days until the repair was completed. My car has 180K miles on it and has not had many issues.

3. I live in sunny So Cal and as I write this it’s 92 degrees outside and my A/C stopped working! Bad news! I again used Facebook to ask for referrals and got a few from trusted friends. The diagnostic fee was reasonable for the one I contacted, and they came highly recommended from a realtor friend. The other recommendation couldn’t make it out for 3 days which wasn’t going to work but at least they came highly recommended from someone who had the know, like and trust factor with them.

Whether you are leveraging a business relationship or personal relationship, use those relationships to get referrals for things that you need from a trusted source. It’s much better and will producer better results then going to read an online review. Oftentimes those reviews that have some negative comments are someone going on the attack and you can’t be sure if the service was really that bad or if they were just mad.

Keep thinking like a negotiator

Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Eldonna Lewis Fernandez
Veteran negotiation and contracts expert Eldonna Lewis-Fernandez, author of “Think Like a Negotiator,” has over 30 years of experience crafting killer deals both stateside and internationally, many in excess of $100 million. She’s currently the CEO of Dynamic Vision International — a specialized consulting and training firm that helps individuals hone negotiation skills — as well as a nationally regarded keynote speaker, session leader and panelist on the Art of Negotiation. Eldonna may be reached online at

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